Sharing Mom

For the most part, it’s just been Avery and I, alone in the house all day, snuggling and giggling and sharing lunches and having adventures. But now things have changed. Avery’s cousins are coming over most days during the week so that I can watch them while their parents work. It’s so hard to find trustworthy, fun childcare providers. And I’m doing my best to be a fun aunt, and so now there are more kiddos are here to join in the chaos and love. I’m ecstatic about it. Avery loves playing with them, too. But it’s been a big adjustment. People often look at only children as selfish, and I’m determined to make sure our girl doesn’t fit the stereotype. For the most part, she is happy to share her toys and snacks. But she is struggling with sharing her most prized possession … her momma. I am somewhat less available to her than I used to be, and I am seeing new signs of frustration and even anger. This makes me feel a bit special, of course. I think every parent wants the security of having known they’ve successfully bonded with their child. But could I have overdone it? She’s suddenly hearing new phrases like, “I’m sorry. Mommy can’t right now,” and, “Let me help the others first, then I will help you.” She isn’t digging that part. As tough as it can be for her, I am so happy that we have been put into a situation where she has to learn these lessons the hard way. Patience and sharing are important life values, and if she doesn’t learn them now while she is young, I fear it will be an even bigger struggle. I am not her friend or her personal assistant, I am her mom. I think it’s important for her to see me as a real person who has needs and has to multi task. As with all life lessons, she will learn. And I will also learn right along with her. We are figuring this out together.

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